her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
this boner is exhausting
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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