it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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