just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
