Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
At least life still wants to fuck me.