You're completely useless in the revolution.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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