You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
