Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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