they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
