do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
