I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize
