I feel like I'm in dance class right now
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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