the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize