I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Randomize
