He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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