I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
