Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
what is it with giant penises always finding me
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
