Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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