Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
