cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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