Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
this is an emotional support booty call
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
