So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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