week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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