can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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