I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
