I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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