Sorry, I don't speak sober.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
