: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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