Soap is not a condiment
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
