true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
