I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
