hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
