just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Swine flu. Run for my life!
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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