I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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