That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize