i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
its not stalking. its research.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
