I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
