Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
