I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
