True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
