And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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