Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
