it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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