Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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