Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
A+ Viking dick
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
