I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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