Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize