you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
wow bdsm is so cute
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
