too bad you live with your parents still
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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