I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
