in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
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