You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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